


The Flood Before the Freeze

by watcherofworlds



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-07
Updated: 2016-10-07
Packaged: 2018-08-20 01:01:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8230778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watcherofworlds/pseuds/watcherofworlds
Summary: In the brief moment before a mind wipe, Bucky's mind is flooded with memories, memories that he tries desperately to hold on to when he is wiped in preparation for the Winter Soldier's latest mission- killing Steve Rogers.





	

Bucky  _ remembered.  _ He remembered so much, so suddenly-it was like a flood, a rushing, tumbling torrent of information. He remembered the letter he’d received from Steve a few days after his arrival in London, the one telling him that he had, by some miracle, been accepted into the army and would be heading out for basic training soon, the letter that Bucky could tell he had been excited while writing because it had been done in a nearly unintelligible scrawl that implied it had been written quickly, and Bucky had been able to picture him in that moment, the cuffs of his sleeves ink stained, his face flushed with the particular type of pride he felt when he’d done something that the world had told him he couldn’t do.

He remembered the little corner store where Steve would go to buy groceries because it was the only place he could afford them, and how he would always accompany him because odds were good that he would get in a fight if he went out by himself, and he remembered that the girl manning the register always had stray hairs sticking out of her long brown ponytail, and the flustered, distracted air of someone who’s mind was elsewhere, and that whenever Steve would ask her how she was doing that day she would blush and say very quietly “Fine Mr. Rogers, sir, how are you?” and be suddenly unable to meet Steve’s eyes, and Steve would answer her as politely as he answered anyone who asked him that question that he was doing just fine, thank you for asking, and insist that she call him Steve or at the very least Steven, and Bucky remembered thinking how odd it was that Steve kept insisting upon that considering that he had never learned the girl’s name. The girl would always shake her head at this, and insist upon her “Mr. Rogers” nonsense, and Bucky would laugh quietly to himself because it was obvious that she had a crush on Steve, and he couldn’t understand how Steve couldn’t see it and-there was pain, and the memories were gone. Bucky grasped at them, tried to hold on to them, but they slipped away and all he had left was pain. He screamed in agony and found himself praying for a new mission because once the whitewash released him he felt no pain…in fact he didn’t feel anything at all, because it was no longer  _ him _ in control.

After what seemed like an eternity the pain of the whitewash released its white hot grip on his mind and he was free, but he was only himself for a moment before the Winter Soldier started to take over. He remembered only one thing, a name-Steve Rogers- and the Winter Soldier told him that Steve Rogers was his mission and that he had to die. Bucky screamed the only thing that he knew for certain in that moment-that Steve Rogers wasn’t his mission, he was his best friend,  _ more _ than his best friend, his brother, and he couldn’t hurt his brother, but no one heard him. Bucky was trapped inside his own head, and the Winter Soldier reminded him that to  _ him  _ Steve Rogers was nothing more than a target, and then he silenced him, gagged him so that he couldn’t speak, and then everything went black and he knew no more. It was just the Winter Soldier in Bucky’s head now, and the Winter Soldier knew only one thing- that Steve Rogers had to die.


End file.
